The Animal Cage

General
Name: Diabus Tantum
Age/Birthday: 16, October 31
Gender: Female
District: 2
Rich or Poor?: Poor
Weapon Of Choice: Small daggers or throwing knives.
Personality/Appearance
Physical Appearance: She has a short black hair that is cut in layers so the bottom is slightly uneven, but it still looks neat. Her dark blue eyes are so deep, they're almost black.  She has very pale skin, and her fingernails have been sharpened into small talons.
Personality: She doesn't care for other people.  She likes to be alone, but will occasionally tolerate other people.  She can be very sarcastic also.  If you get to know her however, she can be really sweet.  If she's in a bad mood, you don't want to mess with her.
Flaw: She can often be over-confident and refuse help from other people even if she needs it.  She is also brutally honest with people, to the point of mean.  She can not run very fast.
Talents:She can climb trees very well, she can hold her breath for a long time, and she has a REALLY menacing glare.
Family/History
Family: She has no family
Pets: A black tarantula, which is easily kept hidden and concealed from people.
Brief History: Her father died of pneumonia when she was an infant, and her mother was eaten to death by rabid wolves while Vanessa was at school when she was 6.  She has survived on her own since then.
Others
Preferred Angles : Very smart, dark, bossy, dangerous.
Angles this tribute will not do: Dumb, appearance-orientated (a pretty pink girl), or extremely friendly.
Token: A ring with an oval black stone in the center.
Other: When near her, there is a sense of uneasiness.

Heya Animallady! ^_^ welcome to the RPing form, I know you didn't just join the site but I will welcome you anyways! So glad you have decided to join us in the fun and make a character up.

First of all, you have the right idea but there's just a few things I'd like you to fix and maybe I'll throw in some suggestions along the way!

1. Tarantulas aren't allowed in the district.
2. Your history needs four sentences you only have two. Please add more.
3. Your appearance has only three sentences, and the whole sharpening the nails into talons is a no go here, so please change that!

Now for some suggestions on notes 2 and 3, for 2 you could maybe expand on what happened to her family considering no one just comes to earth in an eggshell like Mork did (Very old show you probably don't know it.) but either way it takes two to make a baby, so where are her parents? Anything happen to them? What about siblings? were they ever in the picture before hand? What about her life as a child? You could explain a lot of those things. Or if she has no family where does she live? on the streets? in a house? who does she live with? no one? a friend? more homeless friends? maybe an orphanage?

As for number 3, you could describe her build, is she fat, sleek, slim, athletic build, muscular, chubby, what? Is she tall? short? average? What's her height? like 5'4" ? 5'2" ? 5'8" ? Skin tone? Shoe size? clothing style? Is there any colour in her face at all? What about curves? does she have curves? Is she always seen being glum or no?

Also if you want to edit anything in there is an edit button in the top right hand that you can click and edit and once you've fixed this problems, post back and one of the staff members will have another look!

~Sor